Sunday, April 26, 2009

Let's all celebrate ETC DAY this Friday!!!


I just had the most delightalicious idea! Let's designate Friday, May 1, 2009 as the first annual ETC DAY! I do hate to spend money on promoting and advertising, so I thought it would be fun to launch a mass campaign of grass-roots guerrilla promoting to get the word out about my tres FABOO blog!!!! And best of all, I would hardly have to do a thing! I know all my loyal fans would love to help me and it's so easy, here are some ideas for what you can do to spread the word about Etc:
  1. Make everyone in your family wear a fake mustache all week long with signs around their necks that say "Mass consumer and proud of it!" Then when people ask them about it, they can say they do ALL their shopping at Etc!!!
  2. Spray paint "ETC RULZ", in big orange letters, on your garage door!
  3. Spam the internet like it's 1999! I'll help you by providing a three-tiered outline for getting the word out: Social Networking - Twitter, facebook, myspace, chat rooms, stumbleupon, craigslist, and forums are good places to start spreading the word. Email - Send a announcements to every single person on the contacts list for your email account. Advertising - Put your money where your mouth is and dig deep. Pay to do some prime time advertising for Etc on Tim Adams Designs, Craftcult, Etsybitches, and adwords!
  4. Stand outside of Costco and Sam's Wholesale and stop customers and tell them how much better Etc is than any big box store.
  5. Ladies, your cleavage is prime advertising real estate, use it to advertise more than just your sex appeal! Get "Shop Etc" tattooed on each bazoom!
  6. Expectant mommies, name your babies Betsy Etc!
  7. Go to the airport and love bomb people. Hand out orange paper flowers (available here, at Oriental Trading Company for a special Etc Day price), hug people, and try to assimilate them into the Etc collective. But that is a bit cultish, would a legitimate art venue do that? Oh well, let's just do it and worry about that silly little detail later.
Get the Etc name out there in the loudest, most obnoxious, spammiest way you can think of!!!! Make sure to record your efforts with video or photos (if you upload photos to Flickr, make sure to tag them "Etc Day 2009" because I'll DEFINITELY be doing this next year and for years to come).

I'll be highlighting the funniest, weirdest, spammiest, most personally degrading efforts on my Blog and on my social networks, and I'll make sure to link back to you. For those of you who are not my favorite sellers or BFFs, here is a great opportunity to work your little patooty off and finally get my attention and receive the shop promotions I know I should have been sending your way all along.



5 comments:

  1. That's better than the last thing that was spray painted on my garage. Happy ETC Day!

    PussDaddy

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  2. Thank you, Miss Kitty! May your Etc Day be a day filled with the of joy of spending!

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  3. Hahahahahaha I liked that!! Esp the social networking bit... and the garage paint :)

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  4. Well CARP! I don't have an ETC store any longer to help you with! ;0)

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  5. Thank you so very much, friends! But please do remember, I do not accept any responsibility for Etc Day, I'm just really excited about it. ;o)

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DISCLAIMER: This entire blog is satire, a parody of a certain popular handmade venue. In other words, it's a joke! If you simply *must* contact Betsy Etc to piss and moan about it, please feel free to do so, but understand that you do it at your own risk of being held up for mockery.